You know those tiny squares that we constantly look through each day; the squares that make up thousands of beautiful pictures, each possessing some version of timeless perfection. Ya, those. Today, as I scrolled through them I couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy rise up inside me as I scanned the room before me; seeing a mound of unfolded laundry, beside it, a combination of miscellaneous toys that in no way belonged together and snack wrappers, and dirt.
Recently, I came in contact with an expectation I had set for a family member of mine and almost as soon as I had set it for them, I became unnervingly aware that that expectation wasn't being met. So what did I do? I became upset, hurt, annoyed, and honestly a little bitter. Why hadn't they measured up?
When I look back on this year, I am astounded by God's goodness, I am undone by His grace, I am overwhelmed by His love, and I fall to my knees when I think about His kindness. He is so so kind friends and when I think about 2017, all I can think is "only God."
As a mom, there are a few things that are essential to making life easier; ONE of them being wine...ok, I'm kidding, I'm kidding! But for real COFFEE...alright for real now, all jokes aside. A GOOD DIAPER BAG is ESSENTIAL!
But then one day...I wake up and it just hits me. There's no warning, no sign, nothing. It's just there... like this sudden heaviness is over me from the minute I wake up and I can feel it creeping inside me; it starts in my head, like a fog it clouds my ability to think clearly and clutters my ability to think logically.
This blog has been and always will be the window into our home and I know some people understand that and some don't but I want to constantly strive to be real and authentic with the people that are coming here to read. Because believe it or not...my life isn't perfect
This stage of motherhood has kicked me in the butt. Often days I'm day dreaming about the future, gleaming over self-induced bedtime, the kids being able to actually bath themselves, getting packed into the car in less than 30 minutes, not having to get up from the dinner table for the 7th time because someone decided they actually did want a spoon instead of a fork; you know the little things that come with raising a young family (insert the rolling eye emoji here).
Last weekend we celebrated Eliza Joy turning ONE! As one of my girlfriends would say..."one full circle around the sun, 365 days spent loving you..." HOW IN THE WORLD has this year flown by so fast?! I am still in shock that I have a 4 year old, 2 year old, and ONE year old! Like what in the heck!?
You see...I've always prided myself in being extremely "coachable," I've learned throughout my life how to take criticism and how to use it to propel me forward. But when it comes to self-criticism, I've had a hard time not propelling myself right off the deep end.
I'm not sure if it's the "english"in me or if my family has a serious caffeine addiction (probably the latter) but ever since I can remember, tea has been a way to celebrate the afternoon, warm the soul and bring contentment to those long days.