I'm going to first start off by saying that I am FAR from a chill mom. I'm sure my oldest sister is reading this saying, "she thinks SHE'S a chill mom!?" Because the truth is, I'm still working on that. AND it obviously takes more than 4 WAYS to become a chill mom but these are by far some of the ways I've accomplished becoming somewhat "chill."
But for real, these simple, yet very applicable tasks have truly helped me to let go of my perfection seeking heart and get in touch with the messy reality that I face on the daily. And I hope that these too can help you gain back a piece of your sanity along the way! :)
4 Ways To Become A Chill Mom
1. Teach your kids boundaries.
This is something that was rather difficult to do but something that has significantly changed the dynamic of my relationship with my children. For my oldest, it was teaching her that even though she wakes up at 6 am, the rest of the house was not awake nor was going to wake up for her. The rule is she must stay in her room until 7 am and I set the standard for this when she was just 3 years old. Within a few short weeks of being prompted to stay in her room, she now does so without hesitation, whining, or complaining. She simply wakes up, uses the rest room, and goes back to her room for an hour or less of quiet play. Ladies, I am telling you, this alone has drastically changed our home life.
For my almost two year old son, it's encouraging him to play on his own in his room/play room while I make dinner or nurse the baby. He doesn't always do this well, but he's learning how to successfully entertain himself for minutes on end. I call that a win.
2. Be ok with letting your kids learn how to entertain themselves.
This goes hand-in-hand with #1 but honestly parents...we can't be responsible for playing dress up, Ninja Turtles, or "monster" all day long. If I'm being REALLY real, being a parent in those situations can be one of the most mind numbing things I've ever experienced. Now, don't for a minute think that I don't like seeing my children's joy when I play with them, I just can only handle it in 15 minute increments!
But for real...telling my kids to go downstairs so I can have some quiet time or chat with a friend, or even take a nap has changed. my. life. Kids have to learn how to entertain themselves while simultaneously learning to respect their parents time. We need to be more ok with allowing our kids the freedom to serve themselves both mentally and physically.
3. Give your child/children some responsibilities
I was given the task of completing chores at a young age and although I hated it, it was such a valuable lesson for me to learn; being given a set of tasks or responsibilities instills not only good work ethic but respect as well. A child knowing the importance of putting his/her plate away after dinner, cleaning up their toys, folding laundry, HECK even vacuuming a little, not only gives them a sense of purpose but it shows them the importance of hard work; of taking care of the things around them. I started doing a lot of these things when my oldest was was 2 1/2 and now she is showing her younger brother how to do things on his own and he is eager to follow in her footsteps!
These are things are incredibly simple and easy to teach (yes it may take time and having to let go of your control issues...ahh-hem) but kids are eager to learn and they even think it's fun!
4. Let the kids play in the backyard for heaven sake
Holy moly, I feel like since I was a kid something happened along the way when it became unacceptable to let your kids play outside by themselves. I don't know why parents think they have to watch their children like hawks but geesh, let kids be kids for 30 minutes.
Even for a perfectionist like myself, this simple task has given me such reprieve when I feel like I'm going to lose it. Sure, they come in with dirty hands and feet and you sometimes find them with all their clothes off but wow this has sure been life giving. And my children LOVE IT! They get the chance to be free, to run around without mom breathing down their backs and BONUS, they get some energy out in the midst of it all!
**Obviously this doesn't apply to those without an accommodating backyard.
All you moms are rockstars and I know you are each doing your best on the daily to be all that you can be for your kids, but sometimes you just need an extra kick in the butt ya know? Keep on keepin' on momma's of the world! You're amazing!
And as always thanks for stopping by! If you have any questions, be sure to comment below!
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